5.13.2007

Sorry, Ronald, Diet Coke is a PLUS


Ok, so every morning Roxie gets up and drives to McDonald's to get 32-ounces of slap-me-in-the-face-and-let-the-sunshine-in Diet Coke. Can I get an "Amen"? I've been mocked, ridiculed, looked at and judged like a whore in church as I sip my carbonated non-traditional morning cup of wonderjuice. But now, Popsters, now I have been saved Allelujah! Now, when I get up in the morning I don't immediately drive to the Golden Arches and have to tell that kind little voice at the drive-up window "No, I don't want the new morning roast coffee, hi, no, I don't want the 1/3 pounder of Angus beef or the new Shrek kids meal...just a large diet coke, please and thank ya!" Now I walk to the Fridgedair and open it as when the waves parted for Mo' and there sits on my shelf a shimmering, shiny, frosty 12-oz can of my more acceptable morning drink: Diet Coke PLUS. Now all you naysayers can go to H-E-double hockey sticks because not only am I getting my diet Coke but now, biatches, I am getting essential vitamins and minerals. Diet Coke Plus in the morning ... make sure your breakfast isn't minus it!

No comments:

About Roxie

My photo
Los Angeles/Palm Springs, California, United States
Be. Differently.
Powered By Blogger